I've chosen to go with the 5100's on the front for sure, just unsure on the rears. I have a 4runner and with my setup I must keep a shock that is the same length as stock, so the 5100 rears won't work. The Bilstein HD's have the same valve rate as the 5100's, so it's gonna be either those or the TT FJ's. I can get the TT shocks cheaper than the HD's, so I'd really like to use those IF they will match the 5100 fronts. Thanks for your input.
Senor: you could use the stock shocks with the 3" lift, although about the only thing you're gaining is ground clearance. Aftermarket shocks will give you additional benefits. This article
, although maybe a bit biased, will explain why something like the 5100's is better than using a spacer to lift and stock shocks.